Alright, this week is for lovers like Virginia is for Vaginas. The week calls for a double feature. The picks are Valley Girl and Revenge of the Nerds. The perfect date haps. Stream it, download it, pull out your old VHS or laser disc copy and play that shit!
I mean don't you want to dance around like Lamar in a leotard?
He is so on his way to being as tired as Woody Allen. I tell you, one day you wake up selling sushi to douchebags and the next you're married to one. Oh, I'm being mean.
Nicolas Cage isn't a total douche. He was responsible for Valley Girl and that was my jam! Well, really Deborah Foreman was the reason that movie was soooo totally tubular. She is one of my fashion icons besides Blanche Devereaux.
So, Nicolas Cage. What's the haps? Basically, he just wines and dines his waitress. They bump the dance of the two beast and have superman! Yes, Superman. Their child's name- Kal-el. Yes, Kal-el. Hmm, I wonder if this means Cagemeister has super sperm?
One of my friends had a taste of super sperm before. Not Nic Cage's but super none the less. Anyway, she almost died. She was shaking from orgasmic pleasure. She would talk about this dude for HOURS. She almost lost her mind when this fool broke up with her. I say to the hell with him.
Bitch needed some balance in her life. She was no Lois Lane.
Shmanways, the age difference between Alice and Nic is a mere 20 something years. Hope it last till he passes.
Nic is going through money woes. If you want to help out his family, go see one of his shitty movies like Season of the Witch or Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance.
I will leave you with a clip of sweet sweet Deborah and Nic when he was so punk.
