Saturday, January 15, 2011

Just Messed Up

We just discovered this picture of Woody and Soon-Yi from back in the day. It's so messed up. Damn, What a molester. Mia Farrow is an amazing woman because this is still unbelievable. How he got away with this shit is beyond me?

Oh wait, he's a white man with money. I get it.

Here is our old and very 1st post featuring Woody Check it out.

Birthday Shmirthday

Today is a good day. Your counterparts are MLK Jr. and Lisa Lisa.
Nice Group We commend you! We hope you make the world a better place  too.

However, don't worry about that know what i always say get F'ed UP!

Crawdaddy Alert: Demi Lovato

The Crawdaddy Alert pick for this week is Demi Lovato. Demi has been through some crazy shit last year. We hope this girl can solve her issues before she gets Lohaned and  fucking ruins getting Kombucha for everyone. Sidenote**Kombucha is back at your local health store** 

I can't make that shit on my own. It would be fermented to kill.

Shmanyways, Demi fixin it before she gets Lohaned. Allegedly, she can take coke like a champ. Allegedly, she has a sex tape. Allegedly, she is in treatment for cutting herself, eating disorder, and drankin'. That's a lot of alleged things going on. 

Demi Lovato and Wilma Valderrama
I bet she will come out of rehab getting paid, handling her shit, and will date a bad ass Crawdaddy. I hope it's not this piece of shit Wilmer Wilma Valderrama's ass. Supposedly, this panty sniffin, wanker, polluter, douche crawdaddy has circled around this girl like a vulture. I swear he has sniffed and tried to ruin to many young girls with his 3 inch dick. Whatever, I will get on his ass real soon. He will mos def be the next crawdaddy. 

Man, I lost myself. I think about hiss ass and I lose. I just lose like every girl he tocuhes. Oh, and I really mean LOSE!!!!!! Screw Fez.

Back to the Demi. We wish the ho good luck and a good Crawdaddy.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Watch this

Doesn't the Golden Globe look like some crazy sex toy that Lamar and Khloe are sending their assistants to pick up at Hustler?

Anyway, we're watchin this shit Sunday with some Crab Rangoon. Ricky Gervais is the host! Woot woot. I watched that shit last year with my manZ AND WE PRETTY MUCHED PISSED OUR PANTS.


Birthday Shmirthday

 It's JLD's birthday just like you. She looks freakin AWESOME. Well, this is your counterpart. Get naked like JLD.

you know what I all ways say... Get F'ed UP.

Another Charlie Sheen Sidenote

Capri Anderson
All I'm saying is she calls herself Capri. The bitch is a hooker. So, TMZ ran into Capri in L.A. yesterday. Hooka was talking about how rehab might be the best things for Charlie Sheen. 

Mmm mmm, since when is this hooka trying to put the what's what on Charlie. Please don't act so above it all. You were hangin with that tosser. You were both chocolates on the pillow in that hotel room. 

Whatever I can't stand hookas like this because she is an actual hooka. She acts like she wasn't getting paid $3,500.00 to fucking fuck this Sheen Peen. She said she never expected the night to unfold in that way. She told the interviewer that she was only hired to go to dinner. 

Okay, huh? She has me doing the Britney Spears *huh double take*. I can't believe this shit. How dare she? I mean it's not like every person on God's Hellah Polluted Earth hasn't flipped through the escort section of the Yellow Pages knows what's going down. 

Charlie Sheen and Capri Anderson

She was at the hotel with this douche. I tell you how she expected the night to unfold... with major high grade coke, drinking champagne, taking obnoxious amounts of pills, giving him a BJ, and pass out on 1500 egyptian cotton sheets. 

Jeez what should anyone expect? She's a porn star. She's not a hooker with a heart of gold. She's just a hooker who doesn't admit it. 

Argh, i'm so hateful today. I should go pray about it. I hope you guys don't think I'm too serious... well who cares screw you!!!!!!!!! Hehehe.

Oh, the Britney Spears *huh double take* it will make you laugh!
I really do love brit. She's awesome.

Also, in case you missed the tales of Sheen's dinG A Ling past- check this out.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

James has WOOD

Mr. Woods and Ashley Madison
James Woods. He's in the same league as Christopher Walken but not as cool. Actually, he's not in the same league. Walken would never vote for George W. Bush and be proud of it. Yup, James Woods was proud of that decision. Hmm. Shame Shame. We will give some daps to James he's a damn good actor and a smart cookie.
Mr. Woods and Danielle Panabaker

James ended his full ride for Political Science at MIT for **what what what** acting. Kudos! Looks like it worked out out for the Crawdaddy. acting made James the Crawdaddy he is today. Thank goodness or we would've missed all the silverfoxiness that Mr. Wood is putting out.

James Woods is a Repeat Crawdaddy Offender. Usually, when you are a repeat offender it spells T.R.O.U.B.L.E. titty reaching orgasmic unbounded booty licking experience. It's true.

James is twice divorced. He's dated Dana Delaney, Missy Crider, Lauren Holly, nicolette Sheridan. what makes him Known for his Crawdaddy lifestyle?  He dated Hootchie Heather Graham, Alexis Thorpe, Danielle Panabaker and Ashley Madison . It was hard for James to put Ms. Madison away.  Allegedly, Ashley acted a monkey at Mr. Woods' brothers funeral.
She showed up wearing a mini and high heels. She was chain smoking and acting probably as trashy as Mr. Woods wants her to act in bed.

He can't have that shit in public. He got all depressed and stressed out. He ended up in the hospital. Once the healing was done, he got out and it was all adios puta.

He called her the 'anti christ' and said 'she truly has the soul of a moth and the brain of a trout'. Wow, Ashley what does that say about you? You still let that Wood get your goodies?

Let me tell you what my grandma would call you...a slut puppy and she would be right. Where are your parents? Where are your girlfriends telling you to pull up your panties, put on your new mini, and head to the bar and meet a legitimate bloke?

Oh well, slutty blondes are a breed i don't understand. The guys who push up on em, fuck em, disregard em, and then fuck em again are assholes and we have no patience for 'that guy'.

So, F U James Woods. We're done.
Mr. Woods and Heather Graham
Mr. Woods and Alexis Thorpe

Birthday Shmirthday

Happy Birthday MoFo's!!! Here is your counterpart. Cool ass Rob Zombie. He would be an ultimate crawdaddy. His sweet ass is claimed by one hot SherI Moon. 
Well, you know what I say get F'ed up, eat a cupcake, makeout, and call it a day, a birthday.

it happened in other news

Arnold White, critic for the New York Press, one who may want to be a crawdaddy but is to crotchety to become one or get any.

Read the story from gawker.
Follow the Link

Into it

Yes, we're into it and can you blame us? this is truly some gangsta shit. this website is all about some prostitution type shiz. However, they take this seriously. I bet they act like E.Harmony. Pllllease. We all know the juice. Here is a description of this madness:

sugardaddie is a successful man looking for a woman he can spoil and share his greatest lifestyle with.
Sugarbabe is a beautiful female looking for a financially secure, worldly man who can offer new and exciting experiences.

I'm sure these people are looking just for that. Can't pull one over on me. I am a self appointed scooby doo detective. Let me pull out my magnifying glass and some scooby snacks and I'm ready. i'll find out the true deal of Sugardaddie.
I think this will be Crawdaddies first case.

The Interweb

I swear. I get so frustrated sometimes. I might as well be using fucking NetZero. My bars come and go. Okay, like right now I have 3 bars. Woot Woot. In a minute...HA I can't type fast enough. It's two bars. Now, you understand what I'm working with. Please forgive.

I long for a good network. I also wish for the days of chatting it up in an aol chatroom. maybe, I'll log into my old account and talk to some freaks.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Birthday Shmirthday

It's Renee Zellweger of the 90's. It's muthafuckin Joey Lauren Adams. Damn, I use to hate this bitches voice. Ahh, but what a smile, JLA is a slacker, stoner's wet dream. Not sure what this bitch is up to right now. She is probably drinkin a Long Island Iced Tea at the Hilton in Palm Springs, FL. Well, Happy Birthdays mofo. Live it up. Get F'ed UP!!